Stupid Roller Coasters

I hate roller coasters. My aging body just can’t handle em’ anymore. Simply put… they make me want to hurl. Unfortunately… I appear to be stuck on one right now.

Earlier this month… we were in a valley. The duel diagnosis of bronchiolitis and a bowel hernia was nauseating. But surgery was a success and recovery has been relatively easy! Willow’s off oxygen and is wiggling… jiggling.. and smiling more than ever! The ride since surgery has been… dare I say… enjoyable. Christmas was downright blissful. Just as it should be. Then came today…

Christmas!!!! If only we could turn back time.
Christmas!!!! If only we could turn back time.

Willow had a blood test earlier this week. While it showed zero neutrophils… I wasn’t concerned. She’s had that result before… and is currently healthy. I almost forgot I was on a roller coaster… until the phone rang this afternoon. Apparently…. in addition to a low white blood cell count… Willow has no immature/young white blood cells. Doctors like to see cells of all ages. I didn’t see that coming…

Because of her low count… Willow is at a very high risk for infection. A simple cold could turn serious. My stomach is in knots thinking of all the germs she’s already been exposed to. We went out for Chinese food yesterday. I let her play on the floor of our church this morning. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Life felt so amazing yesterday! It feels so…. so…. icky right now. Especially since I’ve been instructed to start giving Willow Neupogen injections daily. DAILY! It felt doable when it was only twice a week. Now… it’s daily. My poor girl! My poor… poor girl.

Our Big Ol' Box of Needles
Our Big Ol’ Box of Needles

Like any good roller coaster ride…. the nausea usually intensifies with time. My stomach just aches. I want off. Stop this stupid ride!!!! Believe it or not… I used to be a ride operator at Camp Snoopy in the Mall of America. I was in my late teens… early twenties. While I didn’t enjoy rides back then… I tolerated them… and being the person in charge of the buttons was pretty darn fun… until something went wrong. I hated watching people get sick… or worse yet… hurt. What an icky feeling. But that’s what the red “STOP” button was for. Every ride had one. I’ve gotta believe God is in control of this insane ride… and He’s holding my Willow… and He sees our tears… and He hears our prayers. I imagine His hand on the red button. But when will he push it???? He must know something I don’t. Maybe the best part of this ride is yet to come? I don’t know…. I just don’t know… so I guess all I can do is hold on.

Our Christmas card photo for this year. I thought I'd add this to end on a high note. :)
Our Christmas card photo for this year. I thought I’d add this to end on a high note. 🙂

2 thoughts on “Stupid Roller Coasters

  1. I’m so sorry you’ve got this bad news. I can absolutely relate to wanting to get off the rollercoaster. I hope your little poppet doesn’t mind the daily injections horribly.
    I am very glad you got a nice Christmas before the rollercoaster dipped you down again. Thinking of you!

  2. First, the family Christmas picture is absolutely perfect. I love it.

    Now, little miss Willow… My goodness! I hope you are all on the upward ride soon. I have no words of wisdom other than keep praying and we will, too. *Hugs*

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